By: Tom Roth

With the Where’s Waldo? series of childrens books, the definite objective is to find the elusive striped-sneak. Finding him is gratifying, but you just can’t help getting distracted and taking in all the whole image, noticing hidden gems all over the place. Similarly, Austin’s SXSW festival features all your favorite acts, but for every band you want to see, are several you should see based on name alone. From the odd to the relevant, here are the best Austin has to offer this week.

• Thousand Foot Whale Claw
  • The most valuable item in the Smithsonian collection
• Shark Week
  • C’mon… who doesn’t like Shark Week?
• Sweatshop Union
  • Ironic? Yes. Controversial? Yes. 99-percenty? Definitely
• Watch the Duck
  • Mmm… meme’y and delicious
• The Creepy Creeps
  • The Creepy Creeps are watching you sleep
• Teenage Burritos
  • A name like this just makes you wanna be friends with the band
• French Horn Rebellion
  • “Can you hear the people horn? Horning the song of angry men…”
• Humans
  • Show me a more honestly billed group
• Vinnie Cha$e
  • But where is Johnny Drama?
• GASHCAT
  • Two euphemisms in one? What a deal!
• Shit and Shine
  • Shock and awe at its finest.  Mostly just shock.
• Drop the Lime
  • Relevant
• Very Angry Scientist
  • Also relevant
• Guantanamo Baywatch
  • Puts the famous “run” in a new light
• Gringo Star
  • Hey, it’s all about diversification, right? Riiight?
• HolySexyBastards
  • Surprise twist: group is made up of single-parent, Gosling-esque preachers
• Not In The Face
  • I can only imagine what this was inspired by.
• The Terror Pigeon Dance Revolt!
  • Theory: we never see baby pigeons because there are two mega-sized pigeons spawning all the normal sized ones which are actually babies. The mega-pigeons are actually formally known as Terror Pigeons
• Texas Hippie Coalition
  • It’s almost like they were made to perform at SXSW…
• Two Cow Garage
  • The American Dream: a wife, some kids, and a Two Cow Garage.
• Idiot Glee
  • Not sure if this is a Glee reference or not
• Turbo Fruits
  • Who doesn’t want to see Turbo Fruits?
• Manic Sheep
  • By the same token, who doesn’t want to see Manic Sheep?
• Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs
  • See above
• Spider Bags
  • On the other hand, nobody wants to see Spider Bags
• Wet Nuns
  • We’ll assume they got caught in the rain.

• Special Guest

Bonus

• Buffalo Killers
• The Last Bison